Wanted

Missing:
Husband and Dad
If you see this guy...send him home.

So, I haven't been blogging much lately....
WHY?
1) I'm trying to get my house ready to put on the market by the end of next week, so I've been doing all kinds of house work and yard work, which I usually enjoy, but not as much when I'm just doing it for someone else.

2) Lance is in Malaysia for 10 days on business

3) I have five kids

4) Lance is in Malaysia for 10 days....

5) I'm in a rotten stressed out mood because I have five kids going 10 different directions, a house to prepare for the market and Lance is in Malaysia for 10 days.

6) I think Lance did that on purpose.

ALSO

Lance took one of our cameras with him---which is great and fine...I still have another camera here.

BUT

He also took our two memory cards with him...leaving me with none.
Now tell me....what the crap is he going to take pictures of to fill 4 GB of memory cards?!?!?!?
Maybe all the delicious and tasty food they have to offer there?
I think we've seen quite enough of that.
So has Lance :)

Anywhooo....I've still enjoyed visiting all of yours...they cheer me up!
Hopefully I'll get into the swing of things again soon!

P.S. I finished reading Stephenie Meyers' book "The Host" yesterday---very good! Stephenie does not disappoint!! Not quite as gripping and life changing as the "Twilight" series (seriously,I am entirely too caught up in that world...I need help.) but very good all the same!! I highly recommend it!!

Malaysia: Day 1-2

Well, after only 36 hrs, I've finally made it to Penang!
Now that I'm in the Far East, it's time to relate a bit
of ying and yang - the good and the bad. The lucky
and the unlucky. First, my baggage:
Lucky: My checked bag made it in one piece.
Unlucky: My shampoo exploded.
Lucky: It was in a zip-lock bag.
Unlucky: My toothbrush was in the same bag.
Lucky: Pantene's aftertaste is better than Ivory.

First, we had a lay-over in Hong Kong and decided to
see the City. It felt like we were the stupid last place
couple on the Amazing Race. First, here's me
translating a sign:

We took the airport train into Hong Kong and then began looking
for bus #15C. After asking 12 people and going in every direction,
we finally took a cab to take us to the tram up the mountain. Enter
Mr Wang our cab driver. After we got in the cab, he mentioned he
was a security guard and had only been a cab driver for 3 days. Nice.
He then said he only runs at "50% efficiency" which caused him to
black-out 3 days ago. Wonderful. We explained many times we
wanted to be dropped off at the bottom of the mountain so we could
take the tram up, but he still ended up taking us to the top. The
view was nice:
After taking the tram back down the mountain, we finally found
the elusive bus 15C (which we no longer needed):

Well, after all the work, I needed to relax. Luckily, I found a class
doing Tai Chi meditation with swords in the park:

Since their form was a bit off, I gave them a few pointers:


My arrival was obviously not a well kept secret. Calvin Klein had
this giant poster of me put up on a building (See all the scaffolding?
It's made from bamboo!):

Finally, a few shots from around Hong Kong's street markets.
Lots of fun stuff to eat:

...I think it's going to be OK!

Many of you have probably seen this,
but i just had to put it on here so I could
watch it over and over again!

• MTV
• Music Videos
• MTV Shows
• Entertainment News

Guess where I'm going today?!! Yep!
Stephenie Meyer's new book
"The Host" is out!...I can't believe
I forgot it was coming! It'll be a good book
to hold me over until the next "Twilight"
book comes out Aug.2....but who's counting? :)
You can go to Barnes and Noble to get one too!
Here's a 40% off coupon!













Also, any of you who have kids into
"The Lightning Thief" series, book 4 has
been released!...My kids will be so excited!
You can get a 30% off coupon from the same
link above.

Ya-hooo!!!I'm so happy that I'll have a good
book to read while Lance is in Malaysia for 10 days :(

Kids to Parents: You're not measuring up.

OK, most of us with kids are constantly reminded how
terrible we are as parents. This comes from various
sources:
1. Church. Lessons on subjects we're not doing. (canning,
extraction, ...)
2. That snooty home-room mom that made crepes with
fresh strawberries for the 1st grade class party. We
brought cold cereal in baggies.
3. Anyone that drives a Toyota Prius (3,145 mpg) and
looks at our Suburban (12 mpg downhill).

I guess it shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone that
the most frequent source of criticism is our kids. Let
me offer three examples - all from today:

1. Last night we took our three small boys to see the
movie Ironman (PG-13). Chase was a bit concerned
about the rating. We took a chance and while the boys
enjoyed it, sure enough, there were a few things I wish
they didn't see. During church today, Chase drew the
following picture:

There it is in hard facts: Rating: PG-13. Chase's age: 9. We suck.

2. Generally, I cook on Sundays. Today was "Fast Sunday".
Now it's a little known bit of doctrine that the person that
cooks dinner gets to snack before everyone else. It's in the
Book of Mormon. Book of Laban I think. Anyway I had just
put the lasagna in the oven and was snacking on some
chips: kettle-cooked and salty - I could hear my arteries
hardening. And then the following:
Chase: Can I have a banana?
Me: Munch, Munch...sure.
Chase (27 sec later): Can I have a piece of bread?
Me: Munch, Munch...we're going to eat soon.
Chase: But its 100% whole wheat. You're eating chips.
Me: ....ummm...yeah...bread would be fine.

3. OK time to eat the lasagna! Half-way through I realize
Wyatt (age 4) is still wearing his church clothes. I go over
to help him take off his shirt and notice he already has
sauce on it.
Me: Oh, you already have sauce on your shirt.
Wyatt (starting to cry): You should have reminded me to
change my clothes! This is all your fault!

So, there you have it. In the space of an afternoon,
three reminders from the kids that I'm a failure. I can't
wait until they are teenagers.