My Darker Side

Steph was out last week for a super fun time in Nashville at the CMA awards with her awesome sister Carey. I think if she could have gotten back-stage with Brad Pasley she wouldn't have come home (although I think that odd duck Randy Travis, despite his exceptional acting skills, scared her).

I was holding down the fort (sort-of) and decided I needed some bonding time with my three boys. I took them after school for some blazer tag. I expected it to be nearly empty during the week, but there was three birthday parties going on. I just smiled as about 20 5-year old girls and 15 8-year old boys all filed in for some fun. We strapped on our gear and me and my boys headed into the dark room.
Now, I'm not competitive. I don't watch sports and could care less about the score when I play them (maybe that's just what losers say). However, something happens to me in that room. Before I know it, I've lost track of my boys and I'm taking down 5-year old girls as fast as I can. Yeah, so a few of them started crying and the pary girl's dad tried to get between me and them. Moron. That just made him soooo much easier to take out.
Before I knew it, time was up. I came out of my Rambo daze, found my kids and headed over to get my....errr...I mean their score sheets.
Our 5-year old Wyatt was ranked 34th. Hmm, perhaps if his dad had been around to show him how to work it... Conor and Chase did well.
Despite the crying girls, angry (but frightened) looks from parents, and a bit of guilt, I took pride in being ranked 2nd. That was until I saw some stupid girl named Emily aka "2 hot 4 u" that had doubled my score to take 1st. So, I took her outside and open up a can of whoop a**.

OK, not really, but I thought about it.

Perhaps blazer tag isn't for me :)

Halloween II

I know that Lancy-pants already blogged Halloween, but I just wanted to add a few more pictures for journaling purposes... :)

The only way you wouldn't know what mine and Lance's "costumes" were, is if you've been living under a rock...which, surprisingly, there are more than I thought....
But for those who have read the Twilight series by Stephenie Myer, ...well, ....they "got it"

Lance thought of the Werewolf thing all on his own. In fact, up until the night before Halloween , he wouldn't tell me what he was dressing up as...he said it was a "surprise"...but then I caught him making a sign that said, "R.I.P. Edward", and then...I knew... He insists on relentlessly teasing me about my love affair with Edward and the Twilight books...so, he decided to take matters into his own hands. After I was done being mad at him (all the while trying not to laugh). I finally surrendered and made us some shirts to go with his theme...

anywhoo... we went to the trunk-or-treat Halloween evening. Poor Conor was sick and missed school that day, but thought he'd try trick-or-treating for a bit...he only made it around to a couple of cars and decided to sit the rest out...poor li'l guy...there should be a rule against being sick on Halloween..it's like crying at Disneyland...

I like how "Iron Man" is wearing flip-flops...

Jedi Chase, Iron Man Conor, their friend Ben 10 (Dylan), and Optimus Prime Wyatt
Break-up Barbie Lauren and that little Devil (not!) Madi

Here's Master Chase using his mad Jedi skills and the force....

Since Lance and I did the Jacob and Bella thing, Candice and Steve took on the Esme and Carlisle thing...

There's stupid Kevin doing bunny ears behind our sweet friend moment picture...he thinks he's so funny...but we know better... :)

Our "crazy-lady "friend Stacie hanging out with her pet snake...(close your eyes mom...)

And here's the results of our pumpkin carving...
Madi's had a natural frowny-shaped wrinkle in it, so she went with it and made a Frankenstein
Chase beckoning Batman with the Bat signal
Conor did a self-portrait

and Wyatt's "Scary-monster face"

Larry, Curly, and Moe - Squirrel Mafia

About 6 months ago, the kids noticed a squirrel hanging around our house. For some reason, they decided to name it "Larry the Squirrel".

Larry was cute. He ran around. He swished his little tail, he crinkled up his little nose.
Then, Larry found his way into MY attic. Larry was no longer cute. Larry needed to go for a long drive in the country.

So, I borrowed a small animal trap from some friends (they had already stocked up on fresh squirrel and possum meat for the winter) and after some effort, set it up in the attic.

However, Larry was smart. Too smart. He completely avoided the attic and sat out on the fence, mocking me with his bushy tail. I switched the bait in the trap to peanut butter. That was it. His weak spot.

I loaded him in the car, took him for a long drive, and let him go. I returned home the triumphant MAN of the house.

Two days latter, another squirrel was in the attic. Son of a...
This one became known as Curly. Steph got the smart idea of just putting the trap outside in the yard instead of climbing in the attic (see why I married her?). A few days latter we had him! Well, one squirrel may be chance, but two points to something bigger. We had stumbled upon the squirrel mafia. I decided to take Curly in for questioning. Chase and I played the classic good-cop - bad-cop.

Here's Chase (good cop) offering him more peanut butter to rat out his friends.


Then I come in playing bad cop.




Threats of imprisonment, poison, and a dinner invitation couldn't compete with the Mafia's hold on Curly. So, another ride out in the country.

Which brings us to Moe. Yes, another squirrel. Another long ride. At this point, I think I've either gotten all members of the squirrel mafia, or else they are laying in wait with something really bad. Time will tell...

What's this chair made of? ...a...Steel.

Wyatt had a fun 5th B-Day party and at night we decided to go out with our good friends the Fullers. Well, things got a bit out of hand (as usual) and Steph decided to "help" by getting Wyatt's balloon off the back of his chair.
Problem was with her super-human strength, she ripped the back of the chair right off!


In the words of Shallow Hal:
What's this chair made of?!? A...Steel? Yeah? Well, you should get it welded better in the corners!

Now I hope people believe me when I say she beats me if I don't don't pick up my towel!

HSM3 - The Stars are out!

One of the girls' friends decided to have a HSM3 party in a big way and the girls were living big!
- Limo!
- Gift bag with makeup and perfume!
- Free ice cream!
- "Reserved" seating at the theater!


One of the best moments of the night was when they were waiting for the theater to let people in, and one of the girls suddenly said "Oh no, I left my purse in the Limo!" After the stares from the crowd, the only thing our girls could say was, "Don't you know who I am?!?" Nice.


At the ice cream place, they played pin-the-kiss-on-Zac.
Maddie was a mile away.
Lauren won.
Maddie can still go out. Lauren is grounded until she's 24.

Halloween Costumes!

Another great Halloween and we enjoyed dressing up. Despite Steph's incredibly tempting suggestions, I went with something else (although the woop-A one was attractive).

The Boys went the straight forward route: Wyatt: Optimus Prime, Conor: Ironman, and Chase:Jedi.

Madi shows us a new side as Devil-Girl and Lauren went original as "Break-up Barbie".

With this months release of the Twilight movie, Steph has stopped acknowledging anyone not named Edward - although if you saw how white my belly is, I come close on the sparkling skin. After initially getting the evil eye, Steph jumped in and made the shirts herself (isn't she awesome!)

Without further adieu: